You, you and you, the both of you. Come, let's join us.

We've all had our share of funny stories about how we as Filipinos speak the English language. I also go into sleeps. There you go. Sleeps. It's a slip alright. Who doesn't? (Defensive.) Even as I write my blog, I have to constantly do a spell check and most importantly, my sentences have to sound cohesive and grammatically correct. I'm not really a writer to begin with. Writing is just my passion and it relaxes me when I'm able to put down my thoughts in writing. I've had several hilarious HUH moments with the different conversations I've had with people. These are all for real.

The use of the word reach out. We say we want to reach out to someone when another person is unable to communicate one's self well or when one needs to be emotionally secured. But to replace the word outreach for reach out? This can be quite tricky.

him: Melissa, alam mo kung ako sa inyo, dapat sumali kayo sa mga reach out.

me: Sir, ano pong ibig ninyong sabihin?

him: Eto yung pupunta tayo sa iba't ibang communities tapos bebenta natin yung services natin as a group.

me: Ah, outreach!

Somehow I got his drift but I had to verify what he meant lest I reach out to a bottle of vitamins to sharpen my senses. Batang may laban kaya ako.

At another time, I overheard another conversation with this same man and he was asking something from a colleague whom we shall call Rosebud to protect her identity.

him: Rosebud, puede bang makihingi ng pliers?
her: Sige Sir. Sandali lang.

Rosebud goes to the back of the office and searched for a pair of pliers in the toolbox. She goes back to the front and hands over the pliers to him.

her: Eto na Sir yung pliers.

him: Hindi!!! Ang hinihingi ko pliers. Yung pinamimigay. Kasi magma marketing ako at pamimigay ko yung pliers nyo.

her: Ah, FLYERS!!!

him: Oo!!!

Rosebud turned her back trying to suppress her laughter. Not to mention, she couldn't wait to share this story with me.

Another common mistake is the use of the word "regardless". Well, I know of a few people who love to write it as "irregardless". The word "regardless" in itself is enough to cancel out whatever conditions or situations there are. I know of somoene who drafts his emails this way ... (I am writing it using the same font, size and grammar.)

boy pyansa,

i specifically (though he pronounces it as SPISIPIKALLY) instructed you that irregardless of what the others are doing, you have to do what i instructed you to do because i gave you specific instructions. please explain why you did not specifically follow my original instruction when this was already discussed in our meeting and this was the agreement with the others and i specifically told you over the phone. irregardless, you have to follow the specific instruction.

regards, (o di ba, kahit sinabon ka na, may regards ka pa)

xxx

Since it's a Friday, I'll make this blog short and easy to read. Most importantly, funny. I'm sharing several pictures that I got from my sister Marissa. These are pictures of hilarious Pinoy signs. We've got to give everyone the credit for trying. It may not be grammatically correct but context clues sure do work. Remember, there are rules to be follows in the English language. Be discipline ourselves.

Cast Away

That's Frankie, Eva and Mady. Eva and Mady are my college barkadas.

Tom Hanks was stranded in an island together with Wilson, his volleyball friend. He was cast away for 3 years. That sure is a long time to grow his beard and learn the tides. I got cast away for a day in Nagarao Island, Iloilo. Nagarao is located in Guimaras and we took 3 rides to get there in one piece. After the Cebu Pacific flight last Friday, we took a ride to Jordan (pronounced as Hor-dan) Port then we took a bangka for 20 minutes. After which, we took another 1 hour bumpy ride (I got all shaken up by a vibrating car) by land and finally, a bangka ride for 15 minutes. I was enjoying the fresh air and the breeze was relaxing. I even had my hand stretched to touch the waters while I was on the bangka. I have once again loved beaches since I started going on weekend getaways last year. Nagarao had no Globe signal and a generator kept the electricity running but not during the wee hours in the morning. I am one with my phone and it is a must that I have it with me at all times but what good does it do if I have no signal. Thank goodness I had a whole lot of stories to tell the whole time I was with my college friends. I think I blew them away with my laughter and never ending story of whatever came into my mind. We arrived around mid afternoon on the island and I was on the shore feeling the waters on my feet. I couldn't really swim as I wanted to. The shore was rocky and the sun was high up. I spent some time picking seashells on the seashore till I saw a funny looking shell that was moving forward. It was a hermit crab! Pardon my being juvenile about this but I was just amused at what I saw. It was cute. After a few hours of sitting by the beach front, the group decided to go on an island trekking. The whole place was 13 hectares and it was well taken care of before till the owners decided to divorce. Anyway, going back to the trekking, I was in my shorts all geared up to see the island. Well of course, you can say the mosquitoes were all geared up to feast on my legs too.

The island was so beautiful. I've never seen corals in my whole life till I came across one that I thought were giant mushrooms. I wanted to feel it with my hands and it felt soft and a bit slimy. According to Lilet (or Lelet as we couldn't figure out what her name really was), it was indeed a coral. Corals are known to grow if the waters are really clean. That was some kind of a nature tripping for me. The waters were clear though the shores were rocky, I enjoyed the whole experience. I wanted to concentrate on this whole new experience of being the only group of people on an island. We were the only guests - me, Eva, Mady, Frankie and Ritchie. There were 2 caretakers on the island and that's it. If some crazy terrorist wanted to kidnap us, we'd be doomed or should I say, they'll be doomed. They'd have to put up with my jokes. Knock knock. Who's there?

My cast away experience wouldn't have been complete had I not slept in a mosquito net covered bed. Armed with an Off Lotion, I smothered myself with lots of it and went to bed. I looked more like a caterpillar wanting to break free from the cocoon. It has been quite a while since I last slept inside one. That didn't stop me from cracking jokes and sharing silly experiences I had. I wanted to get as much as sleep as midnight neared and around 1:30 AM, the power went off. Uh oh. The girl scout in me prepared me for that big fanning moment. I had to fan myself to sleep in other words. Everything went well except for the fact that I was on the lookout for paranormal experiences. Awoo! That fear lulled me to sleep nevertheless. I was too tired to be a ghostbuster in some virgin island. By the time I woke up, it was time for breakfast. I guess what really kept me going through this cast away moment was the food. It was a feast of seafood and other Filipino dishes. Yummy! I can still taste the cucumber salad and steamed alimasag.

The overnight stay taught me so many things about island living:

1. That I can live without my phone even for a day.

2. Brownish colored water from the faucet for gargling and bathing doesn't hurt. The water was kind of salty but hey, I'm still alive.

3. I enjoyed swinging by the hammock and it needed some kind of push to keep it swinging.

4. I can sleep without air conditioning and my reliable pamaypay will do just fine.

5. All I needed was the company of good friends to keep me alive.

6. I will never think of transforming a coconut husk into some sort of a Wilson to keep me company. I think I'd go crazy.

7. Lastly, I love the sound of birds and the waves touching the shore. I dream of owning my own rest house by the beach. I can live with the silence. It's calming and peaceful.

If I had another opportunity to go island hopping, I definitely will. I was gone during the weekend for this Iloilo trip and I had so much fun. I do have some tick bites on my legs and I suspect, I got it from the hotel where we stayed in the city. When I say some, it's around 8 to 9 big reddish itchy bites on my legs that I'm so tempted to scratch.

Ok here are the quotable quotes from the trip which I think should be highlighted:

1. On the Cebu Pacific flight to Iloilo, there's the usual in flight game. The flight attendant gave out clues and the passengers had to guess what it was. The questions pertained to the Philippines.

Flight Attendant: I'm a big fish. I'm called a whale shark and can be found in Philippine seas.

I guess someone raised his hand and got the answer right.

Flight Attendant: Correct! The answer is Tambunting! (Huh? It's butanding! Tambunting is a pawnshop!)

2. This was from my college friend who wanted to eat sausage in Iloilo.

her: Ang hungarian sausage di ba galing sa Germany? (Ha? Ate, Hungary ang sagot. Gusto mo isama kita sa flight attendant ng Cebu Pacific?)

3. Another friend was trying to tell us about his friend who was sick.

him: Alam mo, yung isang friend namin, may kidney.

We were all waiting for him to finish his sentence but he never did. So we figured, this must be the end of it.(Kuya, lahat tayo may kidney. Baka kidney problem ang ibig mong sabihin.)

Here are the pictures! Enjoy!

The boat ride to Nagarao Island.


The port of Nagarao Island.


The rocky shores.

At the island trekking.
The corals. Really breath taking.

It's Wilson and Friends.

I Don't Get It. Did You? - Part II

Pardon me for a few days absence online. I just got back last Sunday evening from Iloilo. I'll tell everyone about in a separate blog. As promised, here's the second half of the list of things that I hardly understand.

6. swimming in Manila Bay - During summer, I would usually see groups of people swimming in Manila Bay. Complete with black lifesavers, I would see children happily jumping into the murky waters. I would see them somersaulting and doing a freestyle. It's the cute kind of freestyle where their heads are afloat and turns left and right excessively. I do understand that the weather is scorching hot and swimming is refreshing but Manila Bay? Hmmm. Where again? Manila Bay. Hmmm.

7. pro creation in karitons - I once passed by an alley and there on the side was a kariton. It was pushed by middle aged man with his wife by his side. What surprised me was the number of children inside the kariton. They must have been more than 5. I would say I support the bill being passed in Congress limiting the population explosion in the Philippines. Anyway, going back to the kariton, I was just wondering how one can be intimate inside it most especially when the children are also there asleep. Maybe I'm naive but I'm puzzled. This calls for a job for Superman!

8. bathing by the railroad tracks - When I was younger, my dad would often pass by the railroad tracks going to his office in Quezon City. I would often see men bathing by the tracks. They made it look so fun that I would tell my mom "Ma, tignan mo sila maligo, enjoy na enjoy sila." When I say enjoy, it's more of them happily shampooing their hair and excitedly soaping themselves in front of all motorists. As much as they enjoy taking a bath, I also enjoy watching a public shower show. Hahaha! What a peeping tom.

9. anong message mo - We are a nation of dramatic actors and actresses. We love soap operas and we love it when we cry or see other people shed tears. I find it quite odd when someone is asked for a message on national TV. For example:

Boy Abunda: Gretchen, ano ang message mo kay Tony?
Gretchen: Ang masasabi ko lang is we love each other.
Boy Abunda: Ano naman ang message mo sa mga fans mo?
Gretchen: Kuya Boy, I'd like to thank my fans dahil kung wala kayo, wala rin ako. (Walang kamatayang linya to!)

It's a never ending conversation about messages. I've never seen other nationalities have this kind of discussion. Message to the fans, message to your parents, message to the President, message to the Senators, message to the Congress, message to whoever.

10. men with nail polish - More and more men nowadays are turning into metrosexuals. I understand this level of vanity but nail polish? I don't get it. I find it so off. I mostly see policemen with polished nails and before, I had one former co-worker with nail polish on his toe nails and another someone up there with polished finger nails. Mind you, the latter's nails were a bit long. Ewww.

11. coin inside the ear - Men have a fascination for ears. I sometimes see them with a coin in their ear. It can be a 5 peso coin or a 1 peso coin. Would you even be happy to receive a coin if they took it from their ear? I was thinking they could put the coin in their pocket right but why the ear? Talking about the ear, I had this experience with a former someone up there borrow my black ballpen.

him: Melissaaaaa, pahiram ng ballpen mo.
me: Sure, here.

So he proceeds to write whatever it is on his paper. Everything was perfectly fine until he removed the ballpen cap and used it to scratch his left ear. As if that weren't enough, he returned the cap and told me ...

him: Melissaaaaa, here is your pen. Thank you.
me: Sir, ok lang. May extra pen pa ako. (with a smile so it's not obvious that I dread holding the pen)

Ewww. Talk about freebies but not that way. Please.

I Don't Get It. Did You? - Part I

We are ruled by our rational minds. Oftentimes, we see something and it strikes us as odd or weird. It's like a sore thumb sticking out with no purpose at all. In this world, everything has got to have a purpose. Even the corners of a business card had a purpose. I was told how someone picked his teeth using what else? A business card! Business cards with mint on the corners can be costlier though. Same goes for corners of bond papers whether it's new or recycled. It's still for picking your teeth.

Have you encountered things that didn't make sense to you at all? I have a lot of those and I'm still figuring it out as of this writing. You might think I'm infuriated by my list but I'm not. I can just get carried away rationalizing its purpose. A passionate discussion is more like it.

1. security check using a stick - Don't we just hate going to the mall or taking the LRT and we need to open our bags and go through a "security check". Some are more advanced and thorough with their check with the use of metal detectors but a stick? How the hell can that even deter a bomb threat?

lady guard: Good morning Mam, paki bukas lang po ang bag.

The guard uses a stick to search through my bag. She points it for only a nano second and then she starts to frisk my body. The check wasn't even thorough. What if someone had some kind of ammunition in a secret pocket. After the frisking, she taps my butt with the stick. What was that for again?

2. MMDA pink lines - I'm sure by now, everyone has seen those hot pink lines all over the metropolis. I've been trying to figure out what the lines are for. Orie asked if there was a road widening project and what we see are supposed to be the demarcation lines. Doesn't make sense because that meant having some buildings torn down. The answer to my question came from Anne, my friend, when we had lunch at Taboo in Legaspi Village a few weeks back. The hot pink lines serve as a boundary. Take for example if you're waiting for a ride. You're not supposed to go beyond the line. The same is true with sidewalk vendors. I was thinking, there was no need to paint had the MMDA set the following rules:

a. No street vendors allowed.
b. Designate stops for unloading and loading.

Brilliant. Vote for me for MMDA Chair. Metro Gwapo sa 2010 - I cringe at this campaign title.

3. ON DUTY signs for taxis - I've been seeing these signs for several weeks now and I wasn't aware of this new ruling imposed by the LTO. It was also Anne who enlightened me of this purpose. According to her, it's supposed to inform passengers that the taxis they see on the streets can take passengers. I was just thinking that for as long as I see taxis on the streets, they are supposed to serve passengers. Taxis are also equipped with lighted signages right? A lighted one means it's vacant and vice versa.

4. bus inspector with long thumb nails - I'm fettish about nails and feet. I'm one with the masses lately so I've been taking different modes of transportation. Buses for one issue tickets. At some distance during the trip, a conductor comes up and checks all the tickets. I suppose they're looking at the serial numbers and after checking, they punch the tickets with their long thumb nails. Very convenient! Can't they just tear it using their fingers or better yet, use a punching gadget. I've seen one that are used on trains. Maybe the nails are not just for punching. Ewww, I don't want to talk about what else the nails are used for.

5. setting time in quarters - If we are to meet someone, we usually set the meeting in quarters. Whether it's 6:00, 4:45, 1:15 or 2:30. I've never heard of an appointment at 11:41 or anything in excess of a fraction. I don't know why it was set to be that way but it can be otherwise come to think of it. I met a friend a couple of weeks ago and we were supposed to meet in Greenbelt.

me: Sige mag dinner tayo. Anong oras tayo mag-meet?
him: 6:35.
me: Ha? 6:35? Bakit may pa sobra pa?
him: Kasi mag ma Mass ako ng 6:00 to 6:30 tapos from the chapel, maglalakad ako ng 5 minutes to the restaurant kaya 6:35. (Oo nga naman.)

I would have to divide the list in 2 parts as I think I've written a lot for today. Besides, my right wrist still hurts from last Saturday's Wii tennis amateur attempt. I think it got strained from the sudden exercise and I wasn't prepared for it.

Serendipity

Things are falling into places in my life. I cannot get enough of what other people might refer to as coincidences but for me it's God's hand in my life. I can also choose to call it serendipity. Serendipity is when you accidentally discover something fortunate, especially while looking for something else entirely - got this definition from Wikipedia.

I've always been in search of something. As early as 2005, I knew I was meant to be some place else but for so many reasons, I chose to stay. Maybe it was familiarity or being in my comfort zone. Nobody was moving my cheese anyway so why do I even have to complicate my life. Just stay put. That was exactly what I did but fate wanted me to pursue what I really wanted. When I found my chance to do so, I bid my goodbyes. Where to? I don't exactly know but I knew I would be heading to some place better. From the day I decided to change my course, it has been a wonderful journey of discovering so many things about myself. I learned new things, let go of unwanted people, met new friends, spent more time with true friends and most importantly, I got my life back.

My routine has been entirely different. I'm able to get 8 hours of sleep, email and chat more often with friends, write more blogs to share with the reading public and I'm trying new things like cooking (yes I cook) and driving. Writing for me is therapeutic because it allows me to process my thoughts. It makes me realize that I am blessed and I have more than enough to make my life meaningful.

Apart from the physical changes in my routine, there were also changes in my perspective. I had to completely have a paradigm shift. Initially, I didn't have much gusto to move forward. I was wallowing in my whys and what ifs till Joel Osteen came into my life. I will never stop raving about his book Your Best Life Now. It propelled my faith to greater heights. It was so easy for me to say a lot of hurtful words to get back but I chose not to. I've learned to let it go. I've chosen my battles and I'm happy to be where I'm today.

So many wonderful things have been happening to me. When it rains, it pours. Just the other day, I got a call from my old headhunter. It has been awhile since I last heard from her and she shortlisted me today for a job post that needed a business development executive. It was for a consultant position for a European embassy. Then today, I got a SMS from a new headhunter and I was scheduled for an interview tomorrow afternoon. I am truly truly amazed at the things coming my way. It can be overwhelming. I was out for an interview today at Makati and someone recommended this post to me. Tiring as it may seem, I cannot complain. These are all blessings! I feel I am near getting a job soon and maybe this August, I will be back in the corporate world. I am definitely looking forward and excited to set a new groove in my career.

One of the greatest things I found along the way was my spirituality. I was guided by a few friends and this is why I was able to pull myself together. Yesterday, I received an email invitation from Eva, my college friend, for a 14-week program called Retreat for Daily Life. It's a 14 week program that allows you to spend 30 minutes to 1 hour of prayer every week with a spiritual adviser. The program is handled by one of the centers in Ateneo. I reserved a slot yesterday and I filled in an application form and questionnaire and I will be interviewed in order to pass the program. I hope I make it.

I'm happy to create my own path. I was able to make decisions of my own and it wasn't so bad as I thought it would be. Some people may describe me as someone who tends to have a mind of her own but I truly do have a mind of my own! I was created to think independently. We all are supposed to be that way. A few months back, all I did was to take one step to choose to live differently and I blindly took that step not knowing where I was headed to. I was confused, freaked out and lost. As I write this blog, wherever I am now, I'm grateful for the guidance and the blessings that came my way. I was only looking after all for a job and along the way, I found myself. Truly serendipity.

Me, Mii and my Wii

The most complicated gadgets I own are my Canon Ixus camera and my Treo 650 not until Orie and I recently bought a Wii. I confess, I am not a techie. Even it the gadget comes with an instruction manual, I'd have somebody read it for me and tell me how it works. Being techie has the same effect on me as solving mathematical equations - brain freeze. It was in Vancouver that I had encounters of the 3rd kind that I shall call Wii. I was in the mall strolling with Jen, my friend Abbey's younger sister, when she pointed out that straight ahead was a booth selling Wii Fit. Wii? What is that? Jen explains that it's a gaming console from Nintendo and it allows you to virtually play the game. Sounds interesting. As we approached the booth, I saw a Wii board where one had to step on, play and exercise. Did you say exercise?! My bulging tummy needs exercise badly and I thought a Wii would help me get back in shape or so I thought. Notwithstanding the fact that I still have an ongoing membership at Fitness First, for the most part, I'm just simply lazy to exercise.

A few weeks before, my sister Orie asked me if I wanted to purchase one. Her co-worker was selling one for Php 8,500. Hmm, that's cheap. A unit sells Php 20,000+ in the mall. Was thinking maybe it looked like Wii on the outside but it was an Atari in the inside. I never had my own Atari when I was younger but I got to play one using a joystick. I was playing Pacman. I try to stay away from gadgets because for one, it's too technical. Secondly, I have a bad case of eye and hand coordination. I tried playing Mario Brothers using my brother's Nintendo years before and all it does is toughen up my muscles and whenever Mario needed to jump over a hurdle, I unknowingly jump as well. I cannot restrain myself from feeling so into the game. I never thought of it as a way of relaxing just because, I play really uptight. There's all the screaming that I'd be eaten up alive by the dragon and at the same time, I have to step on a flea looking creature. It's just too much for my simple mind. Even a Game and Watch has that effect on me too. So why buy a Wii right? Besides, I wanted to save money since I'm in between jobs. Ok. That's final. No Wii for now.

After a few days, I got a call from Orie asking me if I wanted to buy the unit and I said I wasn't interested till she said "Atchie (that's ate in Chinese), hati na lang tayo." Thinking for a few seconds, I said yes. This is where my techie life begins. It wasn't long when I finally came face to face with my Wii. It had to be converted so it can play pirated games. Orie brought it a few days ago in Greenhills and she had to pay Php 2,500 for the conversion. Now, it was my turn to install the unit in our bedroom's TV. I dread it until Orie installed it on her own because she couldn't wait. Yey! Maybe that was my way of stalling. What a way to be techie. After it was installed, Orie played Wii Sports and I enjoyed seeing her play tennis with the remote securely strapped on her right wrist and she was on her feet. She was virtually doing her swings - forehand and backhand. Cool.

I tried playing Wii Sports yesterday as well and I had fun. It proved a lot of things that I'm still bad with my eye and hand coordination. I did pretty well with tennis and bowling but not in ping pong, golf and baseball. It was quite common to see YOU LOSE on the screen. I also tried to do some training to get a feel of the games and according to the game, my Wii fitness age was 52. Yikes. I enjoyed playing tennis and my right arm hurt. I'll play another round today and see how I'd do.

What's interesting about Wii is that you can create your own Mii. Mii is your character. You can program your built, features, height and weight to recreate your look virtually. Orie did it for me and when it came to height, she kind of shortened it. Hmp! Needless to say, she made me a bit chubbier too to make it realistic. Here's a picture of the Mii creator. I even got to choose the color of my dress. Of course I chose the color pink. How gay is that?

I was telling Robs, one of my best friends, over chat last night that maybe I could use Wii to improve my eye and hard coordination. Maybe it'll even help me in driving. For someone like me who can be oblivious about my surroundings, a Wii might just be helpful. Well, I'm working on my boxing skills too. It kind of takes awhile to get used to having the nunchuk on my left hand and the remote on my right hand. The nunchuk is what I attach to the remote. I still haven't really figured out what the nunchuk exactly is for but for now it's for boxing.

Maybe a few months from now, I'll be an expert on this and who knows, I might just join a Wii tournament if there will be one. This is something new to me. For now, my whole family has to put up with my screaming and selecting PLAY ANOTHER GAME till I get it all figured out.

Trapped

Don't we all get caught in different situations when we feel trapped? Everyone gets stucked one way or another and I for one have been trapped whether it was emotionally, physically or even mentally.

1. Great job offer but horrific work culture - Last Thursday, I received a phone call from the HR head of one of the companies I was applying for. After a two week hiatus, I got a SMS from him asking if he could call me. He wanted to see me the following day so I met him at 3 PM. I was motioned to the conference room where I was to meet him.

him: Hi Melissa, how are you?
me: Ok naman po. And you?
him: Why didn't you call me?
me: Uh, the last time we talked, you told me that you'll have the hiring memo signed by the President and I was asking for a job description.
him: Ah ok.

Isn't that strange, he hardly remembered what we talked about.

him: Melissa, just like we have discussed over the phone, here is our offered salary.

I thought he was going to hand me a formal job offer. It got me excited to know what it was going to be until he handed a small piece of white paper with their logo on it and turns out, it was a company Post It! A what? A Post It with a breakdown of my taxable and non taxable salary. I only use Post Its to remind me of my things to do or to flag my documents but for a job offer, no.

After explaining the breakdown, he smiled and said "That's it." Geesh. A Post It?! How strange. I was left to probe what other benefits and perks I'll be receiving. Admittedly, the package was great. Very tempting. It was more than what I had asked for and and it even comes with a car among others but something just didn't feel right. Mid-way through our conversation, I asked what the position would be. What he did was to open the flap of the brown short envelope on the glass table and peeked at the paper inside.

him: You will be the (position withheld to protect the company).

Then he closed the flap and looked at me and smiled. I don't think I'll ever get to see what was verbally relayed to me in black and white. I was informed that I will only be able to see a formal job offer once I said yes. Would I want to relive the same work culture from where I came from and way of doing things?

2. I am claustrophobic. I never was one till the year 2004. When I have my anxiety attacks, I can take hyperventilating to a whole new level. One of the things I dread is being trapped in an elevator. Oh my. A few years back and I was on my way to work and I took one of the four elevators at the lobby. A few floors up, the elevator stopped. The lift was full of people and I was beginning to panic. Breathe in, breathe out. I visualizing some other situation so I could get my mind off the fact that I was stuck and I don't even know if there was oxygen good for 25 people. I was standing near the control buttons when I heard someone at the back say ...

him: Matagal pa kaya to?
her: Di naman siguro.
him: Buti na lang walang claustrophobic sa atin dito noh?

If I had a thought bubble pop up, it would have said "Waaaaa! Shut up! I am claustrophobic. Don't rub it in and don't even mention it!" As the seconds passed, I wanted to get a brown bag and breathe with it. Hi hu hi hu. This is a brown bag moment and I'm near hyperventilating. The seconds felt like hours and thank goodness, the building engineer got the elevator up and running before I'm featured on Saksi - Mahigit trenta anyos na babae, hindi nakahinga sa elevator! Live! Pasok Macky Pulido!

3. I hate math. It can never love me back. I remember Ma preparing reviewers for my periodical exams back when I was in grade school. I would never forget the moment when I was having a brain freeze when I was in first grade.

Ma: Meh!!! 150 minus 32 equals?!
me: Ma, pagod na ako.
Ma: Meh, paano pag subtraction and the number ends in zero? Di ba you borrow 1 from 5?!
me: Ma, di ko na kaya. :( (You have got to see my face. I was sulking and in tears.)

Ma's patience was tested many times over and she had to give me a hour's break just so I could relax myself and refocus. I was mathematically trapped. I could still add, subtract, multiply and divide now and I'm glad the calculator was invented. Look Ma, no more tears.

4. Two hours of driving class everyday doesn't get me really far. I'm usually around U.N. Avenue, Paco or Pandacan. I'm always stuck in traffic. My classes are from 10 AM to 12 NN and around this time, I drive with container trucks. Lots and lots of them. I didn't even know they were allowed to drive around that time. I know that a truck ban was imposed and they are only allowed on the streets from 9 PM onwards. The trucks weren't imaginary that's for sure because they dwarf the Toyota Vios that I was driving. Being sandwiched in between 2 container trucks can be quite challenging on my driving skills. I can't get too near and I have to maintain a safe distance.

5. There's also this feeling of being trapped at work. Don't you at times feel that what you're doing just isn't what you really love to do. It took some time for me to decide to change careers and pursue what I wanted to do. You have got to have the right reasons to accept a job and it pays to have a plan and know who you really are. When I was younger, I would simply go with the flow and allow other people to maneuver my life but that took its toll on me. I realized that I had to live my dream, make my own music and sing my own song. Much as Pa wanted me to be an accountant, please refer to number 3 - I hate math. When I was applying for La Salle, my first choice was Accounting. This says a lot how much I listen to Pa and how he can greatly influenced me to do things even when I didn't want to. I'm glad I didn't get in Accounting and I got myself into the double degree program. I almost got trapped there. That was close.

6. Don't we all at one time have chosen to be with a friend, co-worker, business associate, boss who wouldn't really do us good? Knowing someone takes time and it also helps to see things from another person's perspective. Being affiliated or being close to someone blinds you. You kind of feel your gut tell you something is just not right but in the end, you'll be able to confirm that after all, you perceived the person correctly and you move away. I've had the experience of being surrounded by characters who after all only thought of themselves. Breaking free was difficult to do but when I found my cue to cut my ties, I chose to be free.

Life gives us so many choices and we can choose where or who we want to be. It's inevitable to fall into traps but I try my best to steer clear more so that I am now free. Should in the future I find myself in another pothole, I'd like to think that I am better at getting myself out of it faster and most importantly, unscathed.